Login to your account

Two and a Half Men

Two and a Half Men

Sep. 22, 2003 CBS

Your rating: 0

5 1 vote

Episodes
Info
Cast
Trailer

Seasons and episodes

1Season 1 Jan. 02, 2026

1 - 1
Most Chicks Won't Eat Veal Sep. 22, 2003
1 - 2
Big Flappy Bastards Sep. 29, 2003
1 - 3
Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell Oct. 06, 2003
1 - 4
If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap Oct. 13, 2003
1 - 5
The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a Hump Oct. 20, 2003
1 - 6
Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys? Oct. 27, 2003
1 - 7
If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake Nov. 03, 2003
1 - 8
Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful Nov. 10, 2003
1 - 9
Phase One, Complete Nov. 17, 2003
1 - 10
Merry Thanksgiving Nov. 24, 2003
1 - 11
Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor Dec. 15, 2003
1 - 12
Camel Filters and Pheromones Jan. 05, 2004
1 - 13
Sarah Like Puny Alan Jan. 12, 2004
1 - 14
I Can't Afford Hyenas Feb. 02, 2004
1 - 15
Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick Feb. 09, 2004
1 - 16
That Was Saliva, Alan Feb. 16, 2004
1 - 17
Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats Feb. 23, 2004
1 - 18
An Old Flame with a New Wick Mar. 01, 2004
1 - 19
I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You Mar. 22, 2004
1 - 20
Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark Apr. 19, 2004
1 - 21
No Sniffing, No Wowing May. 03, 2004
1 - 22
My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet May. 10, 2004
1 - 23
Just Like Buffalo May. 17, 2004
1 - 24
Can You Feel My Finger? May. 24, 2004

2Season 2 Jan. 02, 2026

2 - 1
Back Off, Mary Poppins Sep. 20, 2004
2 - 2
Enjoy Those Garlic Balls Sep. 27, 2004
2 - 3
A Bag Full of Jawea Oct. 04, 2004
2 - 4
Go Get Mommy's Bra Oct. 11, 2004
2 - 5
Bad News from the Clinic? Oct. 18, 2004
2 - 6
The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance Oct. 25, 2004
2 - 7
A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana Nov. 08, 2004
2 - 8
Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers Nov. 15, 2004
2 - 9
Yes, Monsignor Nov. 22, 2004
2 - 10
The Salmon Under My Sweater Nov. 29, 2004
2 - 11
Last Chance to See Those Tattoos Dec. 13, 2004
2 - 12
A Lungful of Alan Jan. 03, 2005
2 - 13
Zejdz z Zmoich Wlosów (Get Off My Hair) Jan. 17, 2005
2 - 14
Those Big Pink Things with Coconut Jan. 31, 2005
2 - 15
Smell the Umbrella Stand Feb. 07, 2005
2 - 16
Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth? Feb. 14, 2005
2 - 17
Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam! Feb. 21, 2005
2 - 18
It Was 'Mame', Mom Mar. 07, 2005
2 - 19
A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise Mar. 21, 2005
2 - 20
I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey Apr. 18, 2005
2 - 21
A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On May. 02, 2005
2 - 22
That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother May. 09, 2005
2 - 23
Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab May. 16, 2005
2 - 24
Does This Smell Funny to You? May. 23, 2005

3Season 3 Jan. 02, 2026

3 - 1
Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts Sep. 19, 2005
3 - 2
Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover Sep. 26, 2005
3 - 3
Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark Oct. 03, 2005
3 - 4
Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs Oct. 10, 2005
3 - 5
We Called It Mr. Pinky Oct. 17, 2005
3 - 6
Hi, Mr. Horned One Oct. 24, 2005
3 - 7
Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop Nov. 07, 2005
3 - 8
That Voodoo That I Do Do Nov. 14, 2005
3 - 9
Madame and Her Special Friend Nov. 21, 2005
3 - 10
Something Salted and Twisted Nov. 28, 2005
3 - 11
Santa's Village of the Damned Dec. 19, 2005
3 - 12
That Special Tug Jan. 09, 2006
3 - 13
Humiliation Is a Visual Medium Jan. 23, 2006
3 - 14
Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded Feb. 06, 2006
3 - 15
My Tongue Is Meat Feb. 27, 2006
3 - 16
Ergo, the Booty Call Mar. 06, 2006
3 - 17
The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer Mar. 13, 2006
3 - 18
The Spit-Covered Cobbler Mar. 20, 2006
3 - 19
Golly Moses, She's a Muffin Apr. 10, 2006
3 - 20
Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro Apr. 24, 2006
3 - 21
And the Plot Moistens May. 01, 2006
3 - 22
Just Once with Aunt Sophie May. 08, 2006
3 - 23
Arguments for the Quickie May. 15, 2006
3 - 24
That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite May. 22, 2006

4Season 4 Jan. 02, 2026

4 - 1
Working for Caligula Sep. 18, 2006
4 - 2
Who Is This Vod Kanockers? Sep. 25, 2006
4 - 3
The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress Oct. 02, 2006
4 - 4
A Pot-Smokin' Monkey Oct. 09, 2006
4 - 5
A Live Woman of Proven Fertility Oct. 16, 2006
4 - 6
Apologies for the Frivolity Oct. 23, 2006
4 - 7
Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head Nov. 06, 2006
4 - 8
Release the Dogs Nov. 13, 2006
4 - 9
Corey's Been Dead for an Hour Nov. 20, 2006
4 - 10
Kissing Abe Lincoln Nov. 27, 2006
4 - 11
Walnuts and Demerol Dec. 11, 2006
4 - 12
Castrating Sheep in Montana Jan. 08, 2007
4 - 13
Don't Worry, Speed Racer Jan. 22, 2007
4 - 14
That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami Feb. 05, 2007
4 - 15
My Damn Stalker Feb. 12, 2007
4 - 16
Young People Have Phlegm Too Feb. 19, 2007
4 - 17
I Merely Slept with a Commie Feb. 26, 2007
4 - 18
It Never Rains in Hooterville Mar. 19, 2007
4 - 19
Smooth as a Ken Doll Apr. 09, 2007
4 - 20
Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot Apr. 16, 2007
4 - 21
Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous Apr. 23, 2007
4 - 22
Mr. McGlue's Feedbag Apr. 30, 2007
4 - 23
Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-Lookin' May. 07, 2007
4 - 24
Prostitutes and Gelato May. 14, 2007

5Season 5 Jan. 02, 2026

5 - 1
Large Birds, Spiders and Mom Sep. 24, 2007
5 - 2
Media Room Slash Dungeon Oct. 01, 2007
5 - 3
Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo Oct. 08, 2007
5 - 4
City of Great Racks Oct. 15, 2007
5 - 5
Putting Swim Fins on a Cat Oct. 22, 2007
5 - 6
Help Daddy Find His Toenail Oct. 29, 2007
5 - 7
The Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room Nov. 05, 2007
5 - 8
Is There a Mrs. Waffles? Nov. 12, 2007
5 - 9
Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids Nov. 19, 2007
5 - 10
Kinda Like Necrophilia Nov. 26, 2007
5 - 11
Meander to Your Dander Mar. 17, 2008
5 - 12
A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh Mar. 24, 2008
5 - 13
The Soil Is Moist Mar. 31, 2008
5 - 14
Winky-Dink Time Apr. 14, 2008
5 - 15
Rough Night in Hump Junction Apr. 21, 2008
5 - 16
Look At Me Mommy, I'm Pretty Apr. 28, 2008
5 - 17
Fish in a Drawer May. 05, 2008
5 - 18
If My Hole Could Talk May. 12, 2008
5 - 19
Waiting for the Right Snapper May. 19, 2008

6Season 6 Jan. 02, 2026

6 - 1
Taterhead Is Our Love Child Sep. 22, 2008
6 - 2
Pie Hole, Herb Sep. 29, 2008
6 - 3
Damn You, Eggs Benedict Oct. 06, 2008
6 - 4
The Flavin' and the Mavin' Oct. 13, 2008
6 - 5
A Jock Strap in Hell Oct. 20, 2008
6 - 6
It's Always Nazi Week Nov. 03, 2008
6 - 7
Best H.O. Money Can Buy Nov. 10, 2008
6 - 8
Pinocchio's Mouth Nov. 17, 2008
6 - 9
The Mooch at the Boo Nov. 24, 2008
6 - 10
He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited Dec. 08, 2008
6 - 11
The Devil's Lube Dec. 15, 2008
6 - 12
Thank God for Scoliosis Jan. 12, 2009
6 - 13
I Think You Offended Don Jan. 19, 2009
6 - 14
David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie Feb. 02, 2009
6 - 15
I'd Like to Start with the Cat Feb. 09, 2009
6 - 16
She'll Still Be Dead At Halftime Mar. 02, 2009
6 - 17
The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'? Mar. 09, 2009
6 - 18
My Son's Enormous Head Mar. 16, 2009
6 - 19
The Two Finger Rule Mar. 30, 2009
6 - 20
Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau Apr. 13, 2009
6 - 21
Above Exalted Cyclops Apr. 27, 2009
6 - 22
Sir Lancelot's Litter Box May. 04, 2009
6 - 23
Good Morning Mrs. Butterworth May. 11, 2009
6 - 24
Baseball Was Better with Steroids May. 18, 2009

7Season 7 Jan. 02, 2026

7 - 1
818-JKLPUZO Sep. 21, 2009
7 - 2
Whipped Unto the Third Generation Sep. 28, 2009
7 - 3
Mmm, Fish. Yum. Oct. 05, 2009
7 - 4
Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator Oct. 12, 2009
7 - 5
For the Sake of the Child Oct. 19, 2009
7 - 6
Give Me Your Thumb Nov. 02, 2009
7 - 7
Untainted by Filth Nov. 09, 2009
7 - 8
Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle. Nov. 16, 2009
7 - 9
Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair Nov. 23, 2009
7 - 10
That's Why They Call It "Ball Room" Dec. 07, 2009
7 - 11
Warning, It's Dirty Dec. 14, 2009
7 - 12
Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste Jan. 11, 2010
7 - 13
Yay, No Polyps! Jan. 18, 2010
7 - 14
Crude and Uncalled For Feb. 01, 2010
7 - 15
Aye, Aye, Captain Douche Feb. 08, 2010
7 - 16
Tinkle Like a Princess Mar. 01, 2010
7 - 17
I Found Your Moustache Mar. 08, 2010
7 - 18
Ixnay on the Oggie Day Mar. 22, 2010
7 - 19
Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave Apr. 12, 2010
7 - 20
I Called Him Magoo May. 10, 2010
7 - 21
Gumby with a Pokey May. 17, 2010
7 - 22
This Is Not Gonna End Well May. 24, 2010

8Season 8 Jan. 02, 2026

8 - 1
Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud Sep. 20, 2010
8 - 2
A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer Sep. 27, 2010
8 - 3
A Pudding-Filled Cactus Oct. 04, 2010
8 - 4
Hookers, Hookers, Hookers Oct. 11, 2010
8 - 5
The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel Oct. 18, 2010
8 - 6
Twanging Your Magic Clanger Oct. 25, 2010
8 - 7
The Crazy Bitch Gazette Nov. 01, 2010
8 - 8
Springtime on a Stick Nov. 08, 2010
8 - 9
A Good Time in Central Africa Nov. 15, 2010
8 - 10
Ow, Ow, Don't Stop Nov. 22, 2010
8 - 11
Dead from the Waist Down Dec. 06, 2010
8 - 12
Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead Dec. 13, 2010
8 - 13
Skunk, Dog Crap and Ketchup Jan. 03, 2011
8 - 14
Lookin' for Japanese Subs Jan. 17, 2011
8 - 15
Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak Feb. 07, 2011
8 - 16
That Darn Priest Feb. 14, 2011

9Season 9 Jan. 02, 2026

9 - 1
Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt Sep. 19, 2011
9 - 2
People Who Love Peepholes Sep. 26, 2011
9 - 3
Big Girls Don't Throw Food Oct. 03, 2011
9 - 4
Nine Magic Fingers Oct. 10, 2011
9 - 5
A Giant Cat Holding a Churro Oct. 17, 2011
9 - 6
The Squat and Hover Oct. 24, 2011
9 - 7
Those Fancy Japanese Toilets Oct. 31, 2011
9 - 8
Thank You for the Intercourse Nov. 07, 2011
9 - 9
Frodo's Headshots Nov. 14, 2011
9 - 10
A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes Nov. 21, 2011
9 - 11
What a Lovely Landing Strip Dec. 05, 2011
9 - 12
One False Move, Zimbabwe! Dec. 12, 2011
9 - 13
Slowly and in a Circular Fashion Jan. 02, 2012
9 - 14
A Possum on Chemo Jan. 16, 2012
9 - 15
The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack Feb. 06, 2012
9 - 16
Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy Feb. 13, 2012
9 - 17
Not in My Mouth! Feb. 20, 2012
9 - 18
The War Against Gingivitis Feb. 27, 2012
9 - 19
Palmdale, Ech Mar. 19, 2012
9 - 20
Grandma's Pie Apr. 09, 2012
9 - 21
Mr. Hose Says "Yes" Apr. 16, 2012
9 - 22
Why We Gave Up Women Apr. 30, 2012
9 - 23
The Straw in My Donut Hole May. 07, 2012
9 - 24
Oh Look! Al-Qaeda! May. 14, 2012

10Season 10 Jan. 02, 2026

10 - 1
I Changed My Mind About the Milk Sep. 27, 2012
10 - 2
A Big Bag of Dog Oct. 04, 2012
10 - 3
Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt Oct. 11, 2012
10 - 4
You Do Know What the Lollipop's For Oct. 18, 2012
10 - 5
That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam Oct. 25, 2012
10 - 6
Ferrets, Attack! Nov. 01, 2012
10 - 7
Avoid the Chinese Mustard Nov. 08, 2012
10 - 8
Something My Gynecologist Said Nov. 15, 2012
10 - 9
I Scream When I Pee Nov. 29, 2012
10 - 10
One Nut Johnson Dec. 06, 2012
10 - 11
Give Santa a Tail-Hole Dec. 13, 2012
10 - 12
Welcome to Alancrest Jan. 03, 2013
10 - 13
Grab a Feather and Get in Line Jan. 10, 2013
10 - 14
Run, Steven Staven! Run! Jan. 31, 2013
10 - 15
Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It Feb. 07, 2013
10 - 16
Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby Feb. 14, 2013
10 - 17
Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries Feb. 21, 2013
10 - 18
The 9:04 from Pemberton Mar. 07, 2013
10 - 19
Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon Mar. 14, 2013
10 - 20
Bazinga! That's from a TV Show Apr. 04, 2013
10 - 21
Another Night with Neil Diamond Apr. 25, 2013
10 - 22
My Bodacious Vidalia May. 02, 2013
10 - 23
Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped May. 09, 2013

11Season 11 Jan. 02, 2026

11 - 1
Nangnangnangnang Sep. 26, 2013
11 - 2
I Think I Banged Lucille Ball Oct. 03, 2013
11 - 3
This Unblessed Biscuit Oct. 10, 2013
11 - 4
Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank Oct. 17, 2013
11 - 5
Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003 Oct. 24, 2013
11 - 6
Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants Nov. 07, 2013
11 - 7
Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie Nov. 14, 2013
11 - 8
Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room. Nov. 21, 2013
11 - 9
Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer Dec. 05, 2013
11 - 10
On Vodka, On Soda, On Blender, On Mixer! Dec. 12, 2013
11 - 11
Tazed in the Lady Nuts Jan. 02, 2014
11 - 12
Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball. Jan. 09, 2014
11 - 13
Bite Me, Supreme Court Jan. 30, 2014
11 - 14
Three Fingers of Creme de Menthe Feb. 06, 2014
11 - 15
Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin Feb. 27, 2014
11 - 16
How to Get Rid of Alan Harper Mar. 06, 2014
11 - 17
Welcome Home, Jake Mar. 13, 2014
11 - 18
West Side Story Apr. 03, 2014
11 - 19
Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang Apr. 10, 2014
11 - 20
Lotta Delis in Little Armenia Apr. 24, 2014
11 - 21
Dial 1-900-Mix-A-Lot May. 01, 2014
11 - 22
Oh, WALD-E, Good Times Ahead May. 08, 2014

12Season 12 Jan. 02, 2026

12 - 1
The Ol' Mexican Spinach Oct. 30, 2014
12 - 2
A Chic Bar in Ibiza Nov. 06, 2014
12 - 3
Glamping in a Yurt Nov. 13, 2014
12 - 4
Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight Nov. 20, 2014
12 - 5
Oontz. Oontz. Oontz. Nov. 27, 2014
12 - 6
Alan Shot a Little Girl Dec. 04, 2014
12 - 7
Sex with an Animated Ed Asner Dec. 11, 2014
12 - 8
Family, Bublé, Deep-Fried Turkey Dec. 18, 2014
12 - 9
Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey Jan. 08, 2015
12 - 10
Here I Come, Pants! Jan. 15, 2015
12 - 11
For Whom the Booty Calls Jan. 22, 2015
12 - 12
A Beer-Battered Rip-Off Jan. 29, 2015
12 - 13
Boompa Loved His Hookers Feb. 05, 2015
12 - 14
Don't Give a Monkey a Gun Feb. 12, 2015
12 - 15
Of Course He's Dead (1) Feb. 19, 2015
12 - 16
Of Course He's Dead (2) Feb. 19, 2015

Creator

Lee Aronsohn

Creator

Cast

Ashton Kutcher isWalden Schmidt

Walden Schmidt

Jon Cryer isAlan Harper

Alan Harper

Conchata Ferrell isBerta

Conchata Ferrell

Berta

Video trailer

Synopsis

A hedonistic jingle writer’s free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.

Two and a Half Men

Original title Two and a Half Men

TMDb Rating 7.1

First air date Sep. 22, 2003

Last air date Feb. 19, 2015

Seasons 12

Episodes 262

Shared0 Facebook Twitter

Similar titles

Your Lie in April

My Love Story!!

Mythic Quest: Raven’s Banquet

Goblin

Drake & Josh

Bookie

Date A Live

No Gain No Love

Amphibia

House

Wednesday

Himouto! Umaru-chan